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277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
7imothysucks
snarthurt

why does every father have the emotional intelligence of a flea

certifiedboob

toxic masculinity

spoekelse872

Not my dad, shut it

mychemicalnations

Okay it’s great that your father doesn’t fall into this category - my father doesn’t, either - but I don’t think that’s a very good reason for telling others to shut it.

spoekelse872

Because it says “every father”, and I’m not here for that. I’m not here for making that an expectation, or making it normal. Some fathers, maybe. Not every father.

snarthurt

if your father was so great why’d he raise such a dipshit

sparkiealexandria

no no. Now I grew up with a shit dad and a shit stepdad (two separate but equal shit dads and even I agree with the idea that we should raise the standards for dads. End the macho man mentality for good. Also, beside the point, telling someone to shut it is 10x nicer than calling them a dipshit. #justsayin

7imothysucks
boarboy

Videogames: you can choose from twenty different eyelashes!!!! oh but you can’t be fat

onsomekingggshit

Yeah, whine about how you can’t have a fat character that can scale walls, or sprint. Please whine more.

boarboy

you’re so right kiddo….. games are very realistic……. like the parts where you die and then come back again? classic realism. 

prokopetz

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loonyloopy

but we can’t have fat people in videogames because fat people are the real fantasy creatures and not like… the dragons. and of course, every thin person can scale a wall. sure sure.

ktobermanns

Y’know what, here’s something that’s been pissing me off for a while. 

Fat? Easy to gain. So so easy. Our bodies want to keep fat around, because we’re designed not to starve.

Dropping fat? NOT so easy. When people talk about “losing fat,” what they’re saying is “I need to override millions of years of genetics to convince my body I’m not dying and it doesn’t need this carefully-stored fuel.” Dieting? Your body thinks it’s starving. Work out like crazy? Your body thinks it’s in a situation where it needs to bring the hammer down on the regular, and that means you need more fuel – speaking just for myself, I want to eat the world after I lift. That shit doesn’t melt away, even if you’ve been training like a motherfucking monster for months and eating right, because the body wants to keep it.

So yeah, the “eat less move more” doctrine can fuck itself right in the face. 

There are very, very active fat people, fat people who are experts at every sport and physical activity you can imagine. But because fat rests on top of the muscle, you don’t know when we’re jacked. Oh, sure, sometimes you can get a idea, if a person is WILDLY active, like for a fucking living. Here’s Samoa Joe, the NXT pro wrestling champion who was literally dethroned last night: 

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Yeah, you can see there’s a lot of power there. 

But a lot of times you can’t. Here’s Vince Wilfork, two-time Superbowl tackling champion:

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And here’s Holley Mangold, 2012 superheavyweight division Olympian: 

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These are people who fight (and flip, and do all kinds of crazy shit in Joe’s case), and run, and lift for a living. 

And they’re not unusual, as much as you’d like to think so. The world is full of fat powerhouses, of fat runners, of fat Crossfitters, and they’re just as good at doing the thing as their smaller counterparts. 

So realism? Fuck off. The only reason we don’t have fat game characters is because society is fatphobic as fuck. 

Also? Saints Row lets you be fat, *and hot,* so don’t even come at me with “nobody wants that.”

thequantumqueer

“fat people can’t climb though”

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(Exhibit A: Fezzik carrying 3 people up a cliff)

“yeah but that’s fictional!”

and video games aren’t?

kyraneko

Apparently weight weighs differently if it’s fat instead of, like, eight different machine guns and a rocket launcher?

Video games let you carry all sorts of shit, they can let you carry your own body.

fatphobiabusters

(This got better) -V

f1rstperson

I love whenever people are like “ugh, fat people can’t climb a wall”. 

Cool story, quick question: can you? 

Because plenty of people aren’t into climbing. Being skinny isn’t what allows people to climb. Training is.

Source: boarboy-old
7imothysucks
october31st1981

I always laugh when somebody declares James Potter on the verge of expulsion for his pranks in fic because Malfoy was literally a Death Eater trying to kill the Headmaster and Dumbledore was like “Let’s just see if we can gently guide him away from this” I’m pretty sure the only thing that gets you expelled at Hogwarts is if you have already straight up murdered someone

drarrysinful

Tom Riddle: *straight up murdered someone*

Dumbledore: *keeps an annoyingly close eye on*

amysantiagone

hagrid got expelled for keeping one (1) spider under his bed

october31st1981

Hagrid got expelled because his spider was blamed for one (1) murder

atrickstertype

Hagrid got expelled because he was half giant and they found a convenient excuse.

baconandmegz

tea

sparkiealexandria

I feel like a middle school teacher listening to gossip about the other teachers…

Source: october31st1981